The Model As Muse: Embodying Fashion At Met Gala 2009

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Last night it was all about the Model as Muse. Embodying Fashion but the trick is that even if some played the sure value with Marc Jacobs, Louis Vuitton, Versace and so on, there weren’t many pointing in the good fashion direction.

Of course, the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Costume Institute Gala started on a firm wrong foot in 2009: Azzedine Alaia’s dissing was a heavy coup on Fashion. But there’s much to learn about the Alaia affair that we may not ever be aware of. The truth (as seen from an outside, shallow point of view) is that Alaia’s creations should have been part of the exhibition and Naomi, Linda and Stephanie Seymour should have participated to the opening gala (they pulled out because of the Alaia incident). Saddened, I leave this regrettable mistake behind and get to the point. The Model point. (the story continues right after the jump with more pictures!)

Iman, every inch the muse the Fashion World deserves wears a gorgeous ivory dress by Donna Karan (Ebony and Ivory… go together in perfect harmony! Lalalaaa). Lauren Hutton’s Michael Kors dress is as close to perfection as humanly possible! She’s incredible! Debbie Harry forgot to take off her pajamas. Oh, they’re Louis Vuitton? Well, I guess that makes it alright. It was passed her bedtime anyway!

Yasmin LeBon’s Christopher Kane dress has a cheap feeling to it (the shoes don’t belong to Met’s Red Carpet!). Elizabeth Hurley’s Elie Saab Couture pale peach dress is simply beyond words! I’m so happy she left all those close-to-the-body dresses she’s so keen on wearing with every formal occasion she gets! (and my, does she look pregnant!) Nadja Auermann’s extraterrestrial Lanvin makes me long for Tilda. Where is Tilda, anyway? Missed her controversial ways! (and she wears Lanvin ten times better than Nadja!)

Claudia Schiffer’s Atelier Versace looks like a spider web but oh, what a beautiful spider web that is! And how she wears it beautifully! A special ugly-mention goes to Shalom Harlow. Otherwise known as a drop-dead-gorgeous woman, now the bearer of a ginormous black plastic bag! Someone should really investigate this Fashion Crime! Erin Wasson in black Phi outfit looks like a biker-cricket without the bike.

Eva Herzigova’s Dolce & Gabbana dress would go better on Scarlett Johansson. And that’s not a compliment. For neither. (I loooove the sandals, regardless of the outrageous similarity between Eva’s dress and ScarJo’s last year’s Met dress) Tyra, Badgley and Mischka is a no-go for you! And that French patisserie hairdo? Absolutely not! Tatjana Patitz was really uninspired when she went for that Carolina Herrera dress! I first thought she was Meryl Streep… Helena Christensen’s Zac Posen “Vogue” dress was inspired by some average dress from the Chinese market. I’m sure of it! (not that there was something wrong with the Chinese market, but I had higher expectations from both Zac Posen and Helena!)

Alek Wek is pink-gorgeous. Amber Valletta is eyes-hurtin-yellow and that James Galanos doesn’t fit her. Nor does that pulled back hair. In short, Amber looks like a bat. An electric yellow bat! Liya Kebede looks good. Could have done so much better! Carmen Kass looks like a younger Tilda. Michael Kors’ balloon lbd could serve her properly in case there’s some jumping from an airplane involved!

Milla Jovovich’s Marni mustard dress looks strange. Almost like an old curtain but so suited for Milla! Natalia Vodianova’s pink Fortuny dress is frumpy. Ugly, too pink, too long, too short to be long, oh, and did I mention ugly? And another one: Sasha Pivovarova looks glamorous. For a stripper! Wearing Giambattista Valli, with blond-gray hair, she looks anywhere near 60 years-old! Jessica Stam looks like a statue. A Rodarte statue. Model-perfect. Raquel Zimmermann should mos def change her hair color. Why not style it electric blue, like that disco Proenza Schouler dress she’s wearing?

Agyness Deyn, exactly how old are you? That Burberry Prorsum dress does no justice to your tender age and your make up artist has a serious color blindness condition! Lara Stone looks like a modern cave-girl wearing that silver Alexander Wang! Bee Shaffer looks ordinary and uncomfortable in that blue Nina Ricci dress. Daria Werbowy. Black Balmain mini dress. Should be great. But it’s not. It’s just ordinary. With a plunging neckline. Karolina Kurkova’s Richard Chai lbd looks alright. Average.

Karen Elson portraying the undead, wearing Chanel. Lily Donaldson proudly wears that black Narciso Rodriguez dress. It’s not her fault the dress looks like a shimmery potato sack, Lily still parades it wonderfully! Coco Rocha looks like a snake with bad hair day. Isaac Mizrahi’s golden dress is beautiful. But matching it with Coco’s hairdo (and color) was a bad idea. Doutzen Kroes, charming on her own. Paired with Phillip Lim’s shimmery dress equals cheap thrill.

Luckily we still have Chanel Iman and her perfect Zac Posen dress! Oh, and Miranda Kerr impeccably wearing Jil Sander! Adding some more positivity with Arlenis Sosa and her silver Alberta Ferretti.
How about your side of the story? Which model have I left out? (and what was she wearing?) Don’t forget about The Immaculate Chanel Snake Anna Wintour and ALT, the Wizard of Ferocioz! (photos via 1, 2, 3)